307       Registered: 03-May-98      Last updated: 03-May-98      Posted to email: 03-May-98

More Homilies

Nobody will ever win the battle of the sexes.
There's too much fraternizing with the enemy.

A baby first laughs at the age of four weeks.
By that time his eyes focus well enough to see you clearly.

Drive carefully.
It's not only cars that can be recalled by their maker.

Don't worry about the world ending today...
It's already tomorrow in Australia.

Character is what you are.
Reputation is what people think you are.

Thousands of years ago, cats were worshipped as gods.
Cats have never forgotten this.

A man usually feels better after a few winks, especially if she winks back.

Friends may come and go, but enemies accumulate.

A man who says marriage is a 50-50 proposition doesn't understand two things:
1 - Women,
2 - Fractions.

The facts, although interesting, are irrelevant.

There is always one more imbecile than you counted on.

The only gracious way to accept an insult is to ignore it.
If you can't ignore it, top it.
If you can't top it, laugh at it.
If you can't laugh at it, it's probably deserved.

He who hesitates is sometimes saved.

The only difference between a rut and a grave is the depth.